What’s the point of all this?

I started this blog about a year ago with the intention of living a more meaningful existence. I’ve struggled a lot with happiness in my life and I’ve blamed a lot of things for that, but who cares? The point is to do something about it.

I’ve tried lots of things: exercise, meditation, changing my diet, stoicism, buddhism, sex, going to college, dropping out of college, cutting people out of my life, doing drugs, drinking, etc. Just about everything. Some of it has worked (never for very long), some of it hasn’t.

What it’s done is help me to learn what I’ve always known – but struggle to KNOW – which is that suffering is a necessary part of life and we can’t be happy all the time. Period.

I mean, that’s really all life is: a fluctuation of sometimes happy, sometimes not. You can’t escape it.

So maybe the trick is to do what we can to stay in that sometimes happy as long as possible and learn to accept the sometimes not.

Groundbreaking, I know. 😛

I’m really just writing this to give me a clear starting point. I need to know what I’m doing here if I’m going to commit to it. I want to commit to it because I miss writing, I love reflection and philosophy, and this domain is too fucking cool to let it go to waste.

So, this is my starting point: I’m 22 years old. I’m engaged to the best person I’ve ever met. I’m deep in student loan debt, living in my first apartment in Charleston, South Carolina. I’m in that sometimes happy place and I want to learn how to stay in it.

So I’m setting out to master fun.

In this simple life that I currently have (wake up, do some work, keep the apartment clean, keep the dog alive, pay off my debts, hang out with my wife) I’m going to see exactly how much capacity for fun exists while still maintaining stability.

Let’s see how the rest of the year unfolds.

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